Breaking Away: I shouldn't want you
by Lyssa Wolf
Summary: Larissa came to Forks to aid her Alzheimer stricken grandmother. As She loses her memories, Rissa discovers her own. Memories that connect her to Emmett. A spark is emitted, will she live once Rosalie realizes a human has fallen for her man? Rev for Rev.
1. Chapter 1 Dirty Laundry

**-1Wow it's been a while! I left off with what? 12 chapters? Well guess what? I'm revamping each one (Because I've subjected you guys to too many errors for way too long) I'm hoping each chapter will have a little bit more meat on it's bones for you. Where'd we leave off? Where Emmett has to tell Rosalie the truth? Oh! I can't wait to show you the new chapters!**

**Anyway! I'll be uploading a new improved chapter every other day at least until I finally get to the new stuff. I hope the revisions help!**

**I don't own any rights to Twilight. Rissa, however, is my creation and I hope readers will enjoy her company. I'd love to hear what you have to say - Lyssa**

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**Chapter 1- Dirty Laundry **

I don't know what I was getting into. It was like heading into battle knowing nothing about the enemy and being completely unprepared. How do you kill a foe your eyes cannot see? I watched as the misting rain attacked my window, and through the shapeless wet bodies of the raindrops I could make out the world that grew along the slick winding road. It was so green, greener then anything that could struggle to live in the Oklahoma clay. Everything here was lush and vibrant, not dry and wilted and thirsty to drink the life the earth that didn't want to give in. Everything seemed full of life here…or at least almost everything.

"Your Grandmother is awfully glad to have you coming to see her."

I glanced at the old man in the driver's seat, "I'm sure she is." I offered trying to slice through the awkward tension that permeated the cab. I suppose that was my fault, I hadn't said too much, and when I did I never gave him too much to go on. Poor Jack. Wait. That was his name wasn't it? Yeah. Jack. Gram should have warned him that I'm way too forlorn with strangers. Though I could doubt that any harm could come from Jack. He was nearly seventy and as thin as a whippet. "Is She getting any worse then usual?" I ask before I let silence kill his efforts to get me to speak. Out of the corner of my eye I watch as the wrinkles of his cheeks fall into place as the small smile he wore faded. He knew who I spoke of. Gail Cole, my Grandmother, and my reason for dragging myself all the way up here had Alzheimer's , and it was steadily taking her away piece by piece.

Jack clears his throat and concentrates on changing lanes. "Well, " He says not taking his eyes off the road as if he's afraid to look at me. "She is forgetting small things. Where she put her keys, where she put her purse…little things, but…"

"It's enough to notice something _is_ wrong." I supplied softly as he words hung in the murmuring of the heater. It was no secret Jack had crush on my little old granny her demise was hurting him just as it was hurting us.

A clatter of hooves mashing against metal rang out through the cab "I don't think your horse cares to be in a trailer." He murmured his eyes wandering to the review mirror just to check. I shrugged a shoulder. "I think after having to stand for a couple of thousands miles, she tired of it.." I said as I frowned at my window. The horse had been my stipulation. Maybe it was a selfish thing to give an ultimatum, but it was because of competing I was able to save for my college education and that was approaching faster than I liked. With the end of this year came the death of my childhood. I wasn't ready for that. I was far from ready.

We fell into an uncomfortable silence, with nothing but the silent rattling as the wet beaded rain collided into the windshield and the occasional frustration of Valentine as she moved within the trailer, letting us hear her unrest. At least in our silence I could finally think. I had come here because no one else in my family would. My mother was halfway around the world on one of her digs. My brother swore he was joining the service over the fall break so he couldn't come, he wanted to be near my father. And my dad had his business to run, so that left me. Sure! I drop everything and rearrange my life because I'm the youngest and it wouldn't kill me to do so. But what's been rolling around in my head had bothered me. I loved my grandmother, and if she was as bad as we're praying she isn't then I would be on the front lines for heartbreak.

I leaned against the door, trying not to look out at the foreign world that wasn't my own. I tried to imagine the grassy slopes of the pasture and the golden hue of the hay against the hints of the red earth that rooted the grass to the world. The skies always seemed to hue themselves an aquamarine shade, no matter if a cloud had grayed the sky, the sun always seemed to make it presence known within time. I missed the cold breath of wind that seemed to puff upon my cheeks at just the right moment in the blistering summers. There the wind was a creature of it's own. Sweet and submissive one day, and a raging tyrant that held nothing but deadly force the next. I must have dozed off, because I was gently awoken from my curled up position against the door by a gentle wrinkled hand on my shoulder. "Larissa."

The door came open with a sudden _whoosh_. The cool rain and humid air came sliding against me as I about fell out of the truck. I grabbed the dash, to steady myself, tucking my chin in as a hot flush began to foolishly seep into my face.

"Rissa!"

I let a steady unnerved breath out and prepared a thick grin for my grandmother.. I slid out of the cab and fell right into the woman's thin arms. She had the smell of roses and rain about her. She had once had brown hair like my own, but now, instead of being streaked with gray, the transformation was complete. Her blue eyes were still the same. As wild and vibrant as the ocean, only now accompanied by the soft wrinkles of age around her eyes. I used to love her hugs, for some reason hugging a well rounded grandma was a pleasure, but I noticed I was now at her height and she was frail. "Oh my look how beautiful." she cried as she captured my face in her warm worn hands. I smiled again just for her. I honestly had no idea what she was talking about. I was plain and _cute_ at best. Her fingers reached behind and yanked my bun loose, causing my long brown hair to tumble in tangles. "Your hair is so long!" she said in near shock as her thin fingers waded through my hair as it hung to my lower back. It was really time to chop it off. I heard someone clearing their throat from the screened in porch. It was then that I realized my grandmother had company. A wave of embarrassment washed over me as she continued to fuss.

"Let's get out of this rain, eh?" she said grabbing my hand. I could hear Valentine's whinnies as they shuddered into the air. "But gram I have to-"

"Nonsense." She said cheerfully as she led me through the flowerbeds and down the path to the porch. "That horse can wait five more minuets."

As stepped into the grasp of her porch I came face to face with the three new strangers. One was in uniform, another in a wheelchair and the third was shyly hanging back. "Charlie, this is my granddaughter. Rissa." I shook Charlie's thick hand. "Rissa, Sheriff Swan," I had a feeling my grandmother was getting too much fun out of doing this to me. Though I don't think she ever really knew of my fear of strangers. "Please, just call me Charlie." He said quietly. It only seemed fair to be informal, since my grandmother worked part time as a dispatcher for the Forks police station. I nodded and quietly inhaled a breath. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

Then a pair of dark eyes met me straight on. Okay! Maybe I can't do this. For a moment the older gentleman's eyes held me captive, I found myself falling into a deep pit of liquid that was quietly stealing the air from my lungs. Within a flinch the gaze released me an a small smile came to the man's lips. "Billy Black." He said as he out stretched his hand toward me. His hands were warmer then I expected, but I didn't quite get too comfortable. I had a feeling the man could see right through me. "Nice to meet you," I said automatically. Breath slowly slipped from my lungs as he let go. A white smile broadened in his tanned face. I really need to chill out, I may survive this after all. I had a feeling Billy was testing me somehow. I glanced up at the boyish face that was shying hanging behind Billy's chair. "That thing back there is my son." Billy said jerking his thumb at the boy. He reached his hand over his father's chair, a smile just like Billy's dawning his face. "I'm Jacob." He said briefly shaking my hand. I couldn't help but return a small smile But as soon as it faded from my lips I looked for a way off the porch and a way from here. "Gram, I really need to get Valentine out, she's been in that trailer for a few hours now." Gram's vivid blue eyes twinkled as she looked at me. "Around back. " she said. "I hope we built what you needed, if not we'll have to get more lumber."

"I'm sure it'll be all right." I offered as I headed for the screen door. "Jacob, why don't you go give her a hand." Billy said huskily, I turned to protest, but Jacob was already at the door. Oh well, too late. I slummed through the puddle ridden yard to the trailer. "So your the one who got permission to ride a horse to school?" Jacob asked as I opened the trailer doors. I fought a flush back down into the depths. "Sort of." I answered meekly. "She's My Ag project." I explained. Though I had the feeling that the agriculture department was going to be tiny. I was good with it so long as I didn't have to do anything that required me to wear that FFA uniform. I'm a jeans an T shirt kind of girl but even I have enough fashion sense to know that that says 'Dork" all over it. I can work up the reputation as a dork well enough on my own I didn't need a uniform to help me out.

Every freshman who joins the FFA was supposed to have a project animal they would care for, show and later sell at auction. I was the only one who didn't choose a lamb, pig, or steer. According to my teacher I was being difficult when I chose a horse to work with. Well it's what I had on hand. I couldn't afford to buy the fence and supplies I'd need to care for another animal. When my situation was explained to the school, I was relived to learn they'd work with me on it. And since the school was directly behind my grandmother's house, I could take Valentine over for evaluation and hide the fact that I couldn't drive all at once.

" That's cool." Jake said, he reached forward to help me lower down the ramp. "Thanks." I murmured. I stepped inside the drafty trailer, rubbing the pale blaze on Valentine's chestnut head as she pushed her head into my chest. "This isn't home, but It'll have to do." I told her, picking through the fine copper hair of her forelock. I only got a gentle warm sigh in return. I untied the lead rope from the bar in the trailer and backed her out into the dreary world outside.

As I walked around the side of the house, Valentine and Jacob in close pursuit, my eyes landed on the newest addition on Gram's property. Impressed I stopped to gawk at the small barn that separated two neatly fenced paddocks. The air still smelled of the pinewood they used. As I stood there staring, Jacob went ahead and opened the gate. I was forced to move as Valentine started to walk forward without me, as if she knew where to go.

"We thought you might have need two pastures." A voice called out. I looked back to find Charlie, with his hands stuffed into the pockets of his pants. "Thanks for helping her, Mr. Swan, I know she couldn't have done this by herself." Staring at intricate knots that plagued the golden wood I realized. This had to cost Gram a fortune. My heart sunk. I had been too selfish.

"Welcome, but it wasn't all me, Bella, my daughter, and some of her friends helped out." I quietly mused over the name. Bella. It didn't sound like a name for someone who wouldn't do manual labor out of the goodness of their heart. "You'll get to thank them as School I suppose." Charlie added as he turned and walked back in the direction of the porch.

"I would have helped." Jacob said with a small smile. "But I was on the rez." I slipped the halter off of Valentine's head, watching her as she charged through the moist fields, enjoying the sweet taste of freedom. She didn't care if it was wet or not. I wished I was like her. "Oh So your friends with Charlie's daughter?" I asked. Trying to keep the conversation going. I had a way of letting conversations die and then making people uncomfortable.

"Sort of." He said watching as Valentine skirted around a corner in the fence line "We knew each other when we were younger, but I don't hang out with her other friends." he said. His tone had gone from cheerful to dry within that sentence. I couldn't help but raise a brow. "Who are her other friends?" I asked as I marched through the wet grass to inspect the barn. "The Cullens." My eyes were wandering down the isle. Two stalls with a feed room and a tack shelf. More then I needed but was overly glad to have. I turned on my heal when I realized the lowness of his tone.

"The Cullens?"

"Yeah, There's five of them at the school." Jacob didn't offer me much of an explanation. "You'll figure it out for yourself." He said with a shrug. The pit of my stomach felt suddenly queasy. I had traded one small town for another, how much different could it be? But then again all small towns have dirty laundry and I had a feeling I was scratching the surface to some of it.

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**Better I hope! Now I do have to add, because I've had a couple read this story and say that Larissa's "Horse situation" is unrealistic. Now that I've added a bit I hope my intentions are clearer. And As a former FFA member I can tell you that being assigned an animal this way was an assignment for our class, and yes you did have to bring the animals to school. Though mind you there were designated days that this happened. It wasn't a everyday thing, so I'm stretching that part of it for the story. I hope you guys enjoy!**


	2. Chapter 2 Horse Power

**Chapter 2- Horse Power**

I suddenly didn't feel so up to going to school after what was left of the conversation between Jacob and myself. "I'm sure their not _that _bad." I said slowly, my glance wandering off to the side as Valentine slowly stepped into the barn. Her pale nostrils were fairing and her soft chestnut ears were twitching to our every word. She was just as anxious as I was, but not nervous enough not to try and nibble on Jacob. Jacob's body suddenly went rigid as Valentines thick demanding lips started pulling at the loose fabric of his sleeve. "Ah!" I snapped at the curious mare, poor Jacob stood at her mercy. Valentine turned and looked at me as if I were spoiling her fun, but she shoved off to inspect the stall. "Nothing quite like horse slobber." Jacob said brightly, as he rubbed his now damp sleeve off on his jeans. I could see the relief in his face. "Sorry," I snickered. "She has a thing for long sleeves." Jacob rolled his sleeves up.

"No, there not _bad._" Jacob said after a pause. "Just different." He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know them well enough to be a judge." He stiffened once again as Valentine's head butted him in the back from the stall window he was no leaning on. He turned his head slowly. "I think you like picking on me." He said as he gently rubbed her blazed head with easy hands. I could tell, he was being brave right about now. "Not much for horses are you?" I said trying desperately to hide the laugh in my voice. He shook his head as he patted Valentine on the cheek. "Horse _Power_,Yes. Horses Not so much. "

"Ah." I should have known. My father and brother were mechanics. Cars had to be a guy thing. "You like putting them together or just taking them apart?" His tanned face lit up in shades I didn't know existed. "Both." He confessed. There was such an enthusiasm in that it was easy to put my fears to rest. Strangely enough we had both opened our mouths and just as we both started to speak at once, Billy's voice was cutting through the moist air as he called Jacob's name. The vowels that formed flopped out of our mouths as if they were dead in the air. Jacob flashed a smile and shook his head as our chaos of words fell to an awkward silence. "That would be my cue to go." He said, staring out at the rain like he wasn't quite ready to get wet. As he turned away I felt compelled to say something. Anything! I couldn't let it just end on that weird awkward tension that swims around new faces. "See ya 'round Jake." I said. To my satisfaction he looked over his shoulder, nodded smiled that smile that I guessing his trademark look and he darted into the rain.

I watched him start to run to the gate. That didn't go too bad I suppose. I cursed as rain began to poor, beating hard against the new barn roof. I could only see the rain and nothing more. "I'll have to get you feed in the morning." I murmured to Valentine as I quietly groomed her, my voice was nearly nonexistent against the rain. I just hope I made the right choice. As soon as the rain had lightened up and Valentine was settled in I raced through the pasture trying not to get too wet. I shrugged off my jacket as I made it to the safety of the porch. My mission to stay dry was futile. I was soaked. Gram met me at the door as I kicked off my goulashes.

"You look like a drowned rag-muffin." She mused as she handed me a towel as I stepped through the threshold. "Gee, and here I thought you said I was beautiful." I mocked as I dried my hair. I could smell the aroma of oregano and garlic in the air. I surveyed the house Gram's room and bathroom was off to my right, to my left and a step down was the living room that seemed drenched in rainy day light. It was probably the largest room in the house. I headed straight for the kitchen. "Something smells good, Gram." I said as I quickly tossed the towel on top of the washer. "Making spaghetti." She said. I watched as her aged hands trembled as she slowly and carefully sliced the onions and garlic on the counter. A surge of pity ballooned in my gut. "Let me help you." I said helping myself to a knife and the garlic. Thankfully she had kept everything in the same places that I remembered. When I found her blue eyes looking at me, all of a sudden it was like she didn't know who I was. After a moment of the awkward stare, realization came to those glorious blues eyes of hers. I fell into her pattern easily, listening to her old stories as I stuffed my face with the wonderful taste of fresh pasta and garlic tomato sauce. I didn't want to lose the feisty woman who was sitting across from me, but the truth was...I was here because we were slowly losing her.

After Gram finally retired to her room, I tip toed across the carpet of the living room and up the stairs where my room and bathroom were.

I sighed when I found my luggage on the landing. I hoped her neighbor, Jack, didn't have to do that. I wheeled the bag into my room. I sighed as I looked around the room. The walls were a pale ocean water blue, the curtains where the color of sand. She had made an ocean retreat out of my room. The nightstand, desk and dresser were all as deep and dark as the hardwood floors under my feet. Seashells were elegantly carved into the sleek polished wood. I set my laptop on the desk, not even wanting to pull it out of it's case. I opened my suit case just long enough to find my pajamas before I left it on the floor. I slithered into the bed, giving a sigh of relief as I sank into the deliciously comfortable blankets. It didn't take the rain long to sing me to sleep with it's drumming.

a loud piercing scream drove me from my dreamless slumber, filling me with fear as lightning cracked through the air, flooding my room with seconds of the eerie light. My brain felt fuzzy but as I heard the cries again I found myself stumbling quickly out of bed. Valentine was the one doing the screaming. I stumbled down the stairs in my flight for the front door just as gram's room became bright with lamp light. I shoved my galoshes on. "Is everything ok? What's going on?"

"I don't know," I said quickly as I ripped my jacket off the coat rack, I didn't even wait to fix my hood. "I'll be right back, stay there Gram." I said as I flew onto the porch, not able to pay mind to the frosty air as I rushed through the screen door an into the pelting rain. The rain came down like icy needles, but I found myself not able to care as I ran around the side of the house, splashing through the puddles as Valentine came in view with a sudden crack of light. Her heavy body had risen in a rear, she was trying to fend off a cougar. Fear flushed through my heart. I opened the gate just as the determined mare flung the creature off.

"Valentine!" I screamed, my voice grating against the thunder. The trees behind the barn crackled and crashed as something large came steaming through. I had no time to pay mind. I was going to get Valentine one way or another. I grabbed her halter as she came running toward me. My eyes were frantically looking for the mountain lion. The creature must have known I was thinking of it, because just as I shoved the gate open the cat sprang up into the lightning filled air. Valentine reared up at the creature, causing me to fall. Just then an inhuman hiss came to my ears. A large mass came shooting through the dark, leaping boundlessly over the fence and into the air he tackled the mountain lion to the ground. I watched horror as it snapped the cat's neck. Valentine's shrill voice filled the air. The mare's body wading over me, separating me from the animal. From between Valentines legs and in the sudden flash of light I saw what it was. A man, one that seemed more beast the human when I realized he had sunk his teeth into the cougar's flesh. I don't know what caused him to look up the moment that he did, but in that instance his eyes met mine. He dropped the animal suddenly, as if shock had rolled through his body. With a blink he was standing. My hands sunk into the dirt as I tried to pull myself backwards, away from him, away from this _thing _but in the seconds of darkness that came after the lightning I lost him, slithering backwards until I hit Valentine's leg, I searched the lighting, fighting to sharpen my vision as it blurred and then…went black completely.

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**Okay! I lied about the "Chapter Every other day thing." I took out the "Car" conversation that Rissa a Jake have, and threw in some more tension instead. Why? Because I have plans. BIG plans. ^.^ Share your opinions I'm all for 'em. 3**


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